1. |
Beautiful One Time
04:14
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she told me i was beautiful one time
i wonder if she'd even recall
oh flaky one
forgetful one
make me feel like i'm nothin' at all
my first memory of her:
i was 6 and she was 4
i was jealous she already knew how to read
i guess that little bitch was always
one step ahead of me
next memory's of making an ass of myself
at her birthday party
i kept raising my hand when the clown asked us questions
for some reason that was really funny
i don't remember her being there
but she says that she was at my pirate party
'twas the greatest party
i told her she was beautiful once or twice
i wonder if it fazed her at all
elusive one
unavoidable one
how many times i gotta fall?
when me & my dad went to stay at their house
i was 14 and she was 12
she went somewhere with her mom and her brother
and i was in her room by myself
i have this absurdly well-lit memory
of reading shakespeare in her bunkbed
it ain't fair, all the crazy new colors
you can use to tint the old pictures in your head
like she told me one time how she remembered thinking
i was suave back in those days
ain't nothin' like the exclusive past tense
to drive the last shred of hope away
but it's still around
and it comes out
at strange times
like right now
when strange lines
leave my mouth, too dull
to cut the strange vines
that keep me out
of her heart
but sure 'nough
she told me i was beautiful, one time
i told her i was falling pretty hard for her
in an email i wrote about a year ago
i told her i was shy and i told her i was dumb
and i told her she was beautiful
she wrote back saying she was taken so i never did find out
if she had ever actually wanted me at all
and that's how she inspired several good songs
and i feel a bunch more coming on
cause last night i went out to north hollywood
to see her band's debut
felt like i was right back in the thick of it
from out of the blue
and the one thing i felt sure i had over her
turns out she has that too
ain't nothin' like somebody younger and smarter
and wiser and better
and cuter and sweeter
to make you feel like you're pissing your life away
and drive that last shred of hope away
but it's still around
and it comes out
at strange times
like right now
when strange rhymes
leave my mouth, too dumb
to nick the strange vines
that keep me out
of her heart
but sure 'nough
she told me i was beautiful one time
so i guess maybe i was beautiful at one time
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2. |
Driveway
03:33
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I could barely believe the love I'd found
It made me say, 'I guess I'm all grown up now'
But a moment later my jaw dropped to the ground
She'd pulled into my driveway just to turn around
If you don't want me, I'd rather not ask
Emotions get the best of me, and I the worst of them
The truth makes me wanna pretend
D'ya want me to not ask?
I could drink a case of you, I still might not get full
But if I just walk away, I won't look like a fool
Well maybe I'm afraid to lose, to try, to get, and to have
But I'll catch you later on, screamin' from the past
Emotion gets the best of me, and I the worst of it
The truth is full of shit
D'ya want me to not ask?
Don't you want me to not ask?
I traveled the world, just lookin' around
Then she came and found me on solid ground
But that's when I heard my least favorite sound
She pulled back out my driveway, she was just turnin' around
Once again I sang a song not knowing what it meant
You were sent to enlighten me, weren't you?
Once again I wrote a song without believing in it
And you came to convince me, didn't you?
You'll leave me in the dust
But I am not as I was
I am better off because
Now the song runs in my blood
And my hope is gone for good
I could barely believe the love I'd found
Couldn't help but say, 'I guess I'm all grown up now'
But to this day, I can't wrap my mind around it
She pulled into my driveway just to turn around
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3. |
Responsibility
02:42
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when i look at you
all i can see is all the work i'll have to do
to even half-assedly try
i'm much too insecure to deal with this uncertainty
so i'll have to be a man and set you free
i can't deal with it,
not knowing exactly how you feel every minute of the day
are you going my way?
i'll go around
see you in my dreams
when i talk to you it feels like work
it's almost all that i can do
to even look into your eyes
i'm much too smart for you and you are much too pretty for me
so i'll have to be a man and set you free
i can't deal with it,
not knowing exactly how you'll feel every second of every day
are you going my way?
i'll go around
see you in my dreams
the memory will eventually move me to action
on something on which the sentiment doesn't apply
i'll anxiously await the right reaction
so anxiously so as not to let the time pass by
now tell me do you really want to be with me, completely?
i didn't think so, pretty baby
it's not our time
when i'm next to you
i just feel guilty for the work you'll have to do
to stand here by my side
i'm much too immature to take responsibility
so i'll have to be a man and set you free
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4. |
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there's nothing at all for me to do
my days of make believe are through for now
if i pretend
my love will all be spent too soon
there's nothing at all for me to say to you
if not redundant, it would be untrue
if you'd pretend
your love would all get spent too soon
well, if this has wings to fly
then let's not weigh it down with elaborate designs
and if this thing's so big and bright
then let's not cram it into telephone lines
i can't tell a lie
i can't tell a lie
there's nobody else around that's you
and if that day ever comes, it won't be soon
could we pretend?
my love longs to be spent on you
though it has only grown to date
and if it keeps up, i could afford to wait
silently
tell me that you'll wait for me
but if this has wings to fly
then let's not burden it with oversight
and if this thing's so big and bright
then let's not cram it into telephone lines
i can't tell a lie
i can't tell a lie
don't ask me
i can't tell a lie
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5. |
True Love
00:57
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I'm too intent
And too intense
There's too much time
And it makes too much sense
There's too much truth
And too much cause
And too many
Acknowledged flaws
I love you for you
I love you for me
I love you because
You're already where you should be
Without me
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6. |
B-side of Ariana
04:15
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Can't you use me for something?
Won't you string me along a few months more?
Won't you use me for something?
I could make your pencils sharper
Than they've ever been before
I'm so tired of being the captain
Of a brokendown ship
I'd rather sweep the deck
Just as long as you ordain it
Can't you use me for something?
Money? Power? Sex?
Cause without you I'm nothing
I sit here all day every day
Writing myself bad checks
I'm so tired of navigating
This pathetic trip
I'll come along for the ride
Just as long as you're driving
I want to be beside Ariana
I want to be the b-side of Ariana
Can't you use me for something?
Won't you use me? I'm not good for nothing
I'm not useless. I know this
I'm not worthless. I'm reasonably sure of this
So use me, yeah
Come on and use me, yeah
You said you were a Bill Withers fan
So use me, yeah
For something
I want to be beside Ariana
I want to be the b-side of Ariana
I'm so tired of being the captain
Of a sinking ship
I'll stow away
I don't give a shit
Tired of navigating this godforsaken trip
Toss me in the trunk
It can't be worse than this
Can't you use me for something?
Won't you string me along a few months more?
Won't you use me for something?
I could make your pencils sharper
Than they've ever been before
I want to be beside Ariana
I want to be the b-side of Ariana
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7. |
My Condolences
04:07
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And maybe you just don't think you have to call
When you say you'll call
True, no one can force you
If you really don't want to
But I'm afraid I can't endorse you, darling
Oh baby, it's out of my hands
Well maybe it's for the best
And if you're really dead
My condolences
And maybe you just wanted to flatter me
To bring me down
Well, mission accomplished
You are a triumphant
Emotional infant, darling
Oh baby, it's out of my hands
I really think it's for the best
Oh baby, I'm out of your arms
You cannot do me any harm
And if you're really dead
I take it all back
I sang you a couple of love songs upon request
And for the last 15 hours or so I've been a nervous wreck
But I got this song from you so let's call it even
And I really don't give a fuck if you ever hear it
If you're dead
Please forget what I just said
Oh baby, you're out of my hands
You're free of my unreasonable demands
And if you're dead
If you're really really really dead
Forgive me, forgive me, forgive me
Forgive me for what I've said
But if you're alive
Darling, if you're really alive
You mean nothing to me
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8. |
Passage of Time
05:29
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Never thought I'd be the one
To fall behind with the passage of time
But now it's hard to believe
That she ever wasn't too good for me
I want her back, I want her back
But she keeps on racing around the track
I see her coming in the rearview
Once again she blows right past
Many times I had good friends
And then grew up and apart from them
So many times I had close friends
And later concluded they were idiots
I never thought I'd be the one
To fall behind with the passage of time
But now it's hard to believe
There was ever a time she would have wanted me
I want her back, I still want her back
But she keeps on racing around the track
It makes me dizzy just watching her
I take a deep breath and pull over
Stupid fucking unsurpassable benchmark
Making me eternally want more
And she's lapped me once again
Now even I cannot pretend
That she's the same girl that loved me then
Yet I can't help but feel it when
I see those eyes
Her freckles are still there (when her makeup's off)
And all the love I recall
Is still with me after all
Makes me think I ought to always
Have some chance in this world
Never thought I'd find a soul
That I would place my own below
Never thought I'd meet a girl
Who'd make me pale next to her
I've never before been one
To fall behind with the passage of time
So maybe it was charity
That made her want to get next to me
I want her back, I want her back
But she keeps on racing around the track
I try to look pathetic as I can
But it's too late, she's found a real man
This is my strength
Make no mistake
This is my best
I must confess
This is my life
The depth and the height
This is my bliss
This is as real as it gets
I'm never meant to be the one for her again
I'm never going to catch up, she's bound to win
I suppose I'll have to stay behind, inside my mind
As time goes on by
Trapped inside a teenage world
Singing teenage songs to teenage girls
I want her back
But she won't be back around this way
Sophie turned 20 today
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9. |
AC, AL, BN
03:36
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Oh if my life was a movie
Edit a word or two, and you could show it in the afternoon
On Fox Family Channel
Oh if my life was to be seen
On HBO, the disclaimer would read:
"Adult Content
Adult Language
Brief Nudity"
You only get so long to learn how to speak
If you don't know by age 5, it's too late, I think
You'll never say a word
And so, too, have I reached an impasse
Gotta learn to love, gotta do it fast
Adult content, adult language, brief nudity
Don't wanna choose
Art over life
Don't wanna choose
Life over art
Won't you help my soul survive
My life?
Natural selection, well it's hit and miss
Why should a man like me look like this? It's ridiculous
Based on my IQ scores, I am a genius
But I'm 19 years old, and I've never had sex
Adult content, adult language, brief nudity
Don't wanna choose
Art over life
Don't make me choose
Life over art
Won't you help my soul survive
My life?
Oh if my life was a movie
I'd watch it everyday, but I bet most of you fools
Would just shut it off and walk away
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10. |
Damn Me
01:59
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damn your ability to make everything alright
and curse you for holding out on me
well damn me for trying so hard
god damn me for not trying hard enough
curse me for being so far away
damn your ability and lack of willingness
to assist in my ceasing to be a mess
well damn me for writing this song
god damn me for not knowing you well enough
for me to have anything else to say
damn my fragility, curse your stubbornness
maybe i should just give it a rest
well damn me for playing this part
god damn you for playing yours all too well
and shame on me for believing in you still
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11. |
I'm the One I Love
03:17
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I'm the one I love
What am I waiting for
Anybody else for?
I'm the one I love
Now I know for sure
Your leaving only makes me love me more
I'm the one I love
I've been with me all along
With my outstretched hands
And my long-term plans
Still I gazed out and beyond
Falling on deaf ears and squeezing stones
But all the years and loves and songs
Lie before me
And seem to spell it out
My epic quest was all in vain
I've never been alone, and now I know
I'm the one I love
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12. |
Alt. Ending
03:40
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I sat next to your mom and her boyfriend
At your concert years ago
It was a brilliant one-night career
And I miss you even though
You never seemed to know or care
Save a tiny lucid moment here and there
And I waited for you
But you never came through
And then you moved away to school
The headliner was a screamo band
I watched you watching them from above
They were loud as hell; they weren't half bad
They played the soundtrack to my deafening love
And I made a vow to myself right then and there
"I'm going to bite and scratch my way into her world, I don't care"
It was intrinsically doomed
I knew I'd never get through
And besides, you were moving away to school
I thought they'd all been written
Your scathing reviews
I thought they would protect me
But I am not immune
And maybe I had it all wrong
Maybe it wasn't your fault
Maybe I should have tried harder
Instead of trying not to try at all
Maybe instead of trying to protect myself
I should have dove all the way in
But the only words that seemed applicable
I saw no way of saying
So I just waited for you
Maybe you didn't have a clue
When you moved away to school
And if I had it all to do over again
I'd say something along these lines:
"I'd love to get to know you" or "You're always on my mind"
Or "I'm falling in love behind your back," "I can't help it," "I can't hold back,"
Or "If you please, I'd like to play a song for you. If you spot inaccuracy, give me the truth."
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S.A. Bach Springfield, Missouri
ever-bewildered anti-folkie from LA-via-Branson-via-LA. singer-guitarist-songwriter w/Oh Yeah, the Future (comma is part of the name), The Middle Initials, Star Maps & The Bachs. my name is trademarked :(
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